Random Notes (1997-1999)
For those few not aware, a faithful no-frills cover of the original
Mystery Science Theater 3000 Love Theme can be found on Destroy All
Astromen! (1994 Estrus Records) from one of our long-time favorite
outfits, Man or Astroman?, the band that put the "SF" in Surf Rock...
So resilient a genre is the genus surfus hysterius that it survived
even a particularly dark day in its infancy as evidenced in Experiment
609: The Skydivers. That painful one featured the stylized rampant
twanging of Jimmy Bryant & His Night Jumpers in their seemingly
successful attempt to drive the motliest crew of revellers ever assembled
on one private airstrip into a collective hip-shakin' frenzy. Thank you,
Nameless Friend, for dragging this singularly disturbing image to the
fore. Looked for Ha-So and Stratosphere Boogie in the canon of guitar
classics lately? Two words: Ain't there!
Experiment 514: Teenage Strangler is another of which I'm especially
fond. It was filmed in and around Huntington, West Virginia, the nearest
"big city" to my boyhood stamping grounds across the river and down the
road a-ways. For reasons unknown and upon reflection, sadly, I was totally
oblivious to these eventful doings at the time thus missing the
opportunity to somehow have been part of it all. However, a pennant from
my alma mater, Rock Hill (OH) High, home of the mighty Redmen, can be seen
displayed on one of the luxuriently panelled walls of Wally's Malt Shop.
Seeing it there never fails to bring about the eeriest chill. That close
to being an extra. Perhaps even (dare I believe) a stand-in for Mikey.
Ever wonder why that kooky Stingray gang's emblem was a bulldog (as
opposed to, say -- oh, I dunno -- a...stingray? It was, if memory serves,
the mascot of another local school, Ashland (KY) High, and indicative of
the movie's nearly non-existent budget. Crazy, man. Built-in props. Gotta
love this business.
Consider this: Bill Corbett plays -- no, make that is -- Crow.
"Corbett" is from the French corbet. It's meaning: "little crow".
Coincidence? Or ...conspiracy?
Torgo vs. Bat Masterson: Sorta. Maybe. Help me out on this, eh. I'm
watching Thunder Road, the Robert Mitchum moonshine classic and it
suddenly dawns on me that the uncredited hillbilly doof who's the apparent
slasher of head revenooer Gene Barry's tires bears a striking resemblance
to everyone's favorite oily big-kneed toady. Torgologists, confirm or
deny! John Reynolds will not return my calls.
"Gotta stop the pandemonium. Gonna blow 'em up with sodium!"
Megathanks, Brains, for gracing us with The Horror of Party Beach! Never
before have tiny bereted surf nazis, innumerable panoramic hinder-shots
and boingin' Fenders blended so seamlessly into a true benchmark of the
beast-and-beach sub-genre. This Experiment may well be the most
convincing missing link between MST and Surf Rock thusfar seen. But
voodoo...in Connecticut!? New Hampshire, maybe.
By the way, the above lyric is from the punchy punk homage to the film by
the Kings of Junk Rock, Sloppy Seconds. It's from their 1989 release
Destroyed (currently available on Metal Blade Records) and features as an
outro the old TV newsguy's yellow account of the slumber party massacre.
True enough, Seconds is no Del-Aires. But they will hurt ya just the same.
But who's counting? Well, uh...that'd be me. We create for reasons
personal. But only those who do it anonymously can truly say they create
for the sheer love of it. The moment we tag a name or an address onto
something we have formed from the ether, we're openly soliciting some
degree of...validation. And when it comes, it is good. On September 13,
1997, the BCPC counter registered the rather magical numeral 3000. A
modest tally by most sensible standards, granted. But still...not too
shabby. You who have visited here and have said kind things about one
thing or another that you've seen or read, know this: My appreciation
knows no bounds.
Season Nine Opener: I have heard the future. It's name... Experiment
901. Once again The Brains dare to be different and jumpstart the newest
wave in audio technology. Just say "Yes" to the Echo-verb 3000 Hypervox
Re-modulator! Know it. Welcome it. Embrace it. Become one with it. Soon
the anxiety will melt away like store-brand hand soap. Really!
All seriousness aside, The Projected Man, with or without the distraction
of the "minor sound problem", is an Experiment unique in its nebulous
oddness. The stiff cocktail-shaker banter, gratuitous titilation and
Supermarionation hairstylings decry a faux-Avengers charm that can't be
denied. All this, the demented electric ratguy and Mitchell references to
boot give it a leg-up on the personal favorites list here.
04/17/98: I've been on-the-air for a little over a year so I guess the
neophyte web-whacker tag can no longer be used as a valid excuse for the
gaffes that still occur. But I've been fortunate to have been graced with
a fairly respectable number of visits due in large part, I'm convinced, to
links provided by higher-profile sites.
If I haven't made it known before this, I'd like to thank those sites for
that. And for providing the avenues of contact with a lot of nice folks
who make this crazy passion for Mystery Science Theater 3000 the wonderful
weird gestalt that it is.
A recent correspondent asked why I don't offer more new content. A fair
question, to be sure. The thing is this: It's never been my intention to
be newsy or to display the cutting-edge. There are many, many sites which
do that far better than I could ever hope to. 'Cause ...well, mainly,
that's a lotta work! Being relatively slothful and unambitious, my aim has
been to point to those good sources and maybe -- just maybe -- be a little
informative and (hopefully) humorous in the process.
If BPCP had a mission statement, it would be Ted Baxter's eulogy to the
late Chuckles the Clown: "A little song. A little dance. A little
seltzer... down the pants."
There are way too many MST sites today offering way too much material
borrowed from Satellite News and from Appleberry and the Official Site.
Right? Wrong? I dunno. But the superfluousness of it is as in-your-face as
it gets. (thus the reason for the masthead quote above our own "episode
guide"). Most of these will seek their own level and eventually disappear.
Me, I'd rather not ride that particular pony down. Not just now.
Nearly as disconcerting are those better sites among the lot which seem to
be constantly undergoing face-lifts. Hey, change is okay. More than okay,
in fact. There is however a certain charm and comfort in familiarity which
is often overlooked or taken for granted. John Powers' Low Budget MST3K
Site, for example, became a favorite of mine because of the identity John
managed to maintain thru evolution rather than revolution. Corporate-types
call it branding. And while that term might be a bit aggressive to apply
to fan webworking, the concept is roughly the same.
So if The Place looks a little dusty these days, it isn't because I don't
see the dust. Just can't bring myself to part with it is all.
09/04/98: So a month goes by. Then another and so on and before you know
it, someone's asking, "What? Nothin' noteworthy?"
Well, yeah. Like "Relatives from the Darkside": There's Torgo's little
collegiate brother, Nicky, from The Screaming Skull. And The Final
Sacrifice's chunky man-of-action, Rowsdower, Canadian cousin of the
immortal Mitchell. Then there's...aw, you know! That guy with the thing
who looks like the guy who did that stuff that time.
I leave it to you create the World's Creepiest Family Tree. MSTiedom needs
one. And I got that other jazz that needs doin'.
10/28/98: Season Nine goes in the books as a short, sweet, undeniably
international one laced with foreign accent riffs a-plenty. Not the best
one ever in this one's estimation. But pretty darn good nonetheless.
This particular crown's shiniest jewels were The Phantom Planet, The Space
Children, and The Final Sacrifice. Of a slightly lesser brilliance were
Brit entries Gorgo and The Projected Man. And of those remaining, only The
Quest of the Delta Knights proved to be an out-and-out painfest. Yet the
fact remains that even the worst MST3K episode ever made — whichever one
that may be for you — is still far better than the next best thing.
02/28/99: The Big Buh-bye. Having heard the news that Season Ten will
be the last for Mystery Science Theater 3000, I am moved as are most
loyalists to express my feelings. Trouble is...even after taking the time
to digest it, I'm not quite sure what they are.
Despite the impending loss, no panic, shock or anger has manifested. Only
the perception that this is the right thing coming at the right time.
The body of work the talented people at Best Brains have produced to date
is a marvel. To have the opportunity to cap it with a milestone season
must be very gratifying for them.
Few of us have known or will know what it's like to work at a job we truly
love for 10 years. Let's be glad for our friends' good fortune, stand back
and anticipate what new craziness they'll doubtless unleash --
individually or collectively -- on a brand new millennium.
04/11/99: The Circle Closes. That Joel Robinson's life after the S.O.L.
included doing "pyrotechnics for the band Man or Astroman" is a joyful and
serendipitous revelation which brings about a curious symmetry to this
column and as well to a site originally described as "MST3K, Surf Rock and
the search for the ties that bind". Search over.
08/09/99: Endgame. Last night brought a close to the little cowtown
puppet show we've made such a sizey slice of our lives. At least, that is,
in the form we've come to know inside and out. And a fine bon voyage it
was.
For me, there was always as much enjoyment in what had come before as in
anticipation of shows to come. And in that, I'm thankful for the wealth of
great material The Brains have given us. It has helped me through some
tough times by providing at any given stretch, 120 minutes of the best
therapy money can't buy.
As for what shape the franchise's next phase takes, my money's on Mystery
Living Room Theater 3000.
(http://members.aol.com/cbesco/notes.html)
